Villiljós

therotund:

There seems to be this misconception that everything an oppressed person does in response to oppression must be somehow educational for the oppressor. Don’t return violence with violence, people say - that isn’t how you engage with people, that isn’t how you teach people.

I’m all for engagement. Heavens know I’ll willingly talk the ear off an elephant given half the chance. I’m all for education. It’s important for people to learn what they are doing wrong.

But this expectation creates a whole lot of problems in reality. Because we are people. And because even though taking the high road is this thing we’re all supposed to aspire to, sometimes what is really truly satisfying is punching someone in the damned nose.

Honestly, I think that’s often pretty educational. It isn’t like there aren’t a variety of calm and reasonable voices out there all saying calm and reasonable things in soothing tones of voice. The people who will listen to that sort of thing can and do listen to it. But the people who need a punch in the nose to get their attention will not be swayed by calm and reasonable words like “rape culture” and “white privilege” and “hate crime” and whatever else.

I’m not a fan of violence. Rape culture is violence - and so I’m not a fan. Joking about raping a drunk girl is not actually humor; it’s violence - and if it takes a punch in the nose to tell someone that, well, that’s an important lesson for them to learn.

Eventually, sometimes, oppressed people bite back.